Moments of Weakness

Happy Free-Thinking Friday!

I promise I had a completely different post in mind and in queue for this week’s post but sometimes, life brings epiphanies and revelations that are just too poignant not to share.

Today, as I prepared to board a flight, I followed the routine procedures, both slightly irritated that the TSA workers in the tiny airport I always fly out of were already exhibiting a passive level of rudeness and surprised that their attitudes, of which I’ve become accustomed, happened to be getting under my skin.

As I waited on the other side of the scanner, wondering what the hold up was, I realize that in all the rush to get myself together and to the airport on time I had forgotten to clear out my jacket pockets. The moment I realized that I was the deterrent I took a deep breath to prepare myself for the moments ahead of me.

I won’t make today’s post about how I felt belittled, disrespected and demeaned. I won’t make this post about how I believe people in customer service roles should behave.  I won’t even rant about how I believe those attending to me could’ve behaved differently.

This post is STRICTLY about how grateful I am for such a mentally exhausting and revealing situation.

Today made me realize that there is value in realizing our own weaknesses. There is more to be learned about ourselves in moments when we don’t have control than in the situations where we are able to think clearly and plan in advance. Today I was forced out of my comfort zone and I cracked under pressure. I walked away feeling heavy and defeated. It made me realize that I’m hurting, a lot more than I had realized. I also realized that there is a lot that I’ve been suppressing and ignoring in an effort to keep my head above water.

I love talking about soul work because it’s the type of internal work that produces external change. The importance of weak moments is that they reveal how much soul work you still have to do. Soul work is what separates those who are internally aware from those who are not. Soul work is what I pride myself on. I know I have a long way to go but I’m grateful for the opportunities to step back and see what weaknesses still hold me back.

Each day I pray that God’s light is shared with all those I come in contact with and today I can say that I didn’t handle the situation the best BUT I’m grateful for a God who is able to use me even when I fall short. Today I pray that even through my obvious irritation (I can’t hide anything, my facial expressions speak for me) & apparent impatience, God was able to work.

At the end of the day, I’m grateful for today’s moment of weakness because it reveals many things

  1. There is soul work to be done
  2. I have been passively hurting and until I address these present wounds, I won’t be my best self.
  3. Understanding the fact that no one is their worst moment will allow me to approach everyone with compassion even on their worst day.
  4. The world is a better place when compassion is the baseline of every interaction.

 

Today was hard and it’s only 10am but because I live by the philosophy that nothing happens without reason I am able to learn from today and for that I am grateful.

As I was walking away with annoyance in my body and tears in my eyes, I came to the conclusion that today must’ve been the perfect day for me to learn this lesson. I walked away grateful that I still have time on this Earth to learn from my weaknesses.

Happy Free-Thinking Friday everyone!

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