Happy Self-Love Sunday. I wrote the following words on June 28 as I travelled to South Africa with my choir. Today, we begin our journey back home to the States. I hope you enjoy the post and Happy Self-Love Sunday!!!
I don’t know how to read a book without a pen so I’m 14000 ft above the earth spiraling towards the airport at 324 miles per hour and all I want to do is read ‘Helium’ by Rudy Francisco but I’m typing about this dilemma instead. I asked for juice twice, knowing I only had the stomach for one cup. So a cup half full of apple juice has been taunting me for thousands of miles now. Constant pain and discomfort reminds me that maybe humans were never meant to fly. Up until about 14 years old, plane rides were unbearable. I used to moan and cry the entire descent. It felt as though my ears were begging for removal from my body as though they were being held captive. My ears would be stopped up for days after the flight. Even when I used to swim, hearing afterwards was always an issue. I’d lie on one ear patiently waiting to be able to hear again. Pleading for release that always seemed to come by happenstance. I’d drop hot oil in my ear and follow every single instruction I could find online, only to realize, each time, all it took was time. I’d be standing at the bathroom mirror with tears in my eyes because I couldn’t hear and then just happen to turn my head just right and feel a warm drop of water run out of my ear.
The aspect of Self-Love I’m focusing on in my personal life is time. I’m realizing that healing and growth depend so much upon time. A few weeks ago, I did something I’ve been really afraid to do. I’ve been so afraid that I literally put it off for over a year. This particular situation requires acknowledgement and participation from someone else. The issue with placing your growth in someone else’s hands is the fact that you can’t control how or when they receive you. I allowed myself to be vulnerable and I put all of my chips on the table and now I’m just giving the situation time. I’m realizing that the world does not move at my pace. I’m also realizing that waiting for time to reveal what is and is not for me is an important part of my growth. I have so much to learn and I don’t want to stop learning and growing. Self-Love is a journey and not a destination.
Happy Self-Love Sunday! Don’t let the journey pass you by but take pride in every step along the way. ✨